Energetically Clean

Energy Leaks & Loving Limits: The New Way to Set Boundaries Without Guilt

July 12, 20255 min read

What Are Energy Leaks?

Energy isn’t just a spiritual idea. It’s a constant, invisible exchange between you and the world around you. Every conversation, thought, scroll, or intention carries a frequency. And without conscious awareness or energetic boundaries, you can easily absorb energy that isn’t yours. Even from across a room, through a message, or halfway across the world.

If you’re deeply attuned, compassionate, or the person others naturally lean on, your system may unconsciously “reach out” to scan, soothe, or carry the emotional weight of those around you. Over time, this creates energetic congestion, leaving you feeling heavy, scattered, or inexplicably off.

Protecting your energy doesn’t mean shutting people out. It means honouring your own field so you can stay anchored in your truth, not everyone else’s emotions.



What Are Energy Leaks?

Energy Leaks are the subtle but powerful drains on your mental, emotional, and physical wellbeing. They’re often caused by unconscious patterns like people-pleasing, overthinking, unclear boundaries, unspoken resentment, or staying too long in environments that don’t feel safe or aligned. You might not see the leak, but you’ll feel the effects. Here a few examples of such signs:

  • Unexplained fatigue

  • Irritability or emotional spikes

  • Scattered focus

  • That sense of being “on” — even when you’re alone

These leaks usually stem from a nervous system conditioned to monitor others’ moods, needs, or expectations. Especially if your past sense of safety came from being helpful, likable, or easy to be around. 

Over time, this creates chronic emotional overfunctioning. Not because you’re weak, broken, or “too sensitive”… but because your energy is being quietly siphoned by patterns you’ve outgrown.

If this resonates, what you’re experiencing isn’t laziness or burnout.
It’s a boundary issue, just not the kind we’re usually taught to recognise.


What Boundaries Really Are (and Aren’t)

Most people think of boundaries as rules or hard lines:
“Don’t speak to me like that.”
“I won’t answer emails after 6pm.”
“No is a complete sentence.”

Yes, these are important. But at their core, boundaries are not just about what you say.
They are about what you energetically allow, respond to, absorb, or protect yourself from.

A boundary is not a wall. It’s a bridge that lets you stay connected without abandoning yourself.



The Nervous System Behind Boundaries

When you’ve spent years in environments where your needs weren’t consistently honoured; whether through childhood conditioning, people-pleasing, perfectionism, or subtle trauma; your nervous system may associate “being good” with self-abandonment.

In these states, your body may operate from the following responses:

  • Fawn response 

This occurs when you prioritise others to maintain a sense of safety.

  • Hypervigilance 

You constantly read the room and people, striving to stay ahead of any perceived conflict, and attempt to diffuse situations before they arise. This may involve over-preparing by imagining worst-case scenarios and devising ways to manage them.

  • Emotional burnout 

This results from consistently holding space for everyone except yourself.

This leads to what I call invisible energy leaks. Where your body and mind are always “on,” even in stillness leaking out your energy and maybe even absorbing bad external energy.

happy skies


What Do Energy Leaks Look Like?

If you’re unsure whether you’re leaking energy, ask yourself:

  • Do I leave interactions feeling depleted or resentful?

  • Do I struggle to say no even when I know I need to?

  • Do I take responsibility for how others feel or react?

  • Do I second-guess myself after setting a boundary?

  • Do I feel tired after holding space, even with people I love?

These are signs your energetic container is too porous, and your system is compensating for a lack of internal safety.


The Spiritual Side: Boundaries as Self-Worth in Action

From a spiritual perspective, boundaries are more than behavioural tools.
They are energetic declarations of worth.

They say:
“I am enough, even when I disappoint others.”
“I honour your needs, but not at the expense of my peace.”
“I can be loving without leaking.”

When you set boundaries from fear, they feel cold, rigid, or brittle.

When you set them from self-trust, they feel loving, clear, and powerful. Even when they’re uncomfortable.

How to Create Boundaries That Actually Support You

1. Get Clear on Your Non-Negotiables

Start small. What drains you most? Is it last-minute requests? Constant WhatsApp chats? Overthinking others’ moods?

Pick one energy leak.
Ask:
“What would it look like to honour my needs here without guilt?”

2. Use Somatic Check-Ins Before You Say Yes

Before agreeing to anything, pause.
Breathe.
Scan your body for tension or resistance.
Ask:
“Is this coming from love… or from fear of not being liked?”

Your body always knows.

Here is a simple body scan.

3. Try the Boundary Reframe

If boundaries feel “mean” to you, reframe them like this:

This isn’t about controlling others. It’s about choosing how I want to feel in my own life.”

Want more? Read Crush Mental Load: Unlock Work-Life Harmony Today where I provide more practical tips on setting healthy boundaries

4. Practice Energy Hygiene

Not all boundaries are verbal.
Sometimes they look like:

  • Taking 5 minutes to clear your energy before re-engaging

  • Visualising a golden light around your body

  • Using affirmations like “I release what’s not mine to carry”

Take a look at this post to see other methods I use to protect my energy. Find what you can easily fit into your daily routine simply yet effectively. In addition here are some affirmations you may want to adopt. (You can also try the Worthiness Reset ritual to help anchor this.)



Final Thought: Boundaries Are Not a Luxury, They Are a Form of Love

You don’t need to justify, explain, or over-process your boundaries to earn the right to have them.

In fact, your ability to hold boundaries is the very thing that allows your compassion, intuition, and brilliance to thrive, without burnout.

✨ The more you honour your own energy, the more powerful your presence becomes!

Ready to go deeper?

Book your Clarity Call Today
Try the Free Worthiness Reset Ritual
→ Follow me for more practical, soulful tools

You don’t need to be less sensitive. You need to be more supported.

I hope this exploration of how to protect your energy has inspired you on your journey towards personal growth and well-being. I'd love to hear your thoughts on this topic. Do you have any insights or personal experiences to share? Feel free to get in touch with your feedback or ideas for future blog posts. Your input is invaluable, and I look forward to engaging with you!


Spiritual Coach, supporting those who carry it all with grace to reclaim their worth, trust their intuition, and feel grounded — even in life’s chaos. By blending mindset work, energy healing, and soulful practices to help clients reconnect with who they truly are beneath the noise.

Tranquil Guide

Spiritual Coach, supporting those who carry it all with grace to reclaim their worth, trust their intuition, and feel grounded — even in life’s chaos. By blending mindset work, energy healing, and soulful practices to help clients reconnect with who they truly are beneath the noise.

Back to Blog